Quotes by Victor Borge

Victor Borge

…the elephant smoked too much.

Elephants

Music

Too Much

(Referring to the piano’s natural shape) Isn’t it a shame when those big fat opera singers lean against the pianos and bend them?

Opera

Piano

Shapes

(Responding to a sneeze from the audience) Who exploded?

Audience

Responding

A Smile is a curve which can set a lot of things straight.

Curves

Smile

Always remember to forget the things that made you sad, but never forget to remember the things that made you glad.

Happiness

Never Forget

Remember

And now, in honour of the 150th anniversary of Beethoven’s death, I would like to play ‘Clear the Saloon’, er, ‘Clair de Lune’, by Debussy. I don’t play Beethoven so well, but I play Debussy very badly, and Beethoven would have liked that.

Debussy

Play

Saloons

Beethoven wrote in three flats a lot. That’s because he moved twice.

Flats

Moved

Three

Clarinets, like lawyers, have cases, mouthpieces, and they need a constant supply of hot air in order to function.

Funny

Humorous

Music

Did you know that Mozart had no arms and no legs? I’ve seen statues of him on people’s pianos.

Legs

People

Piano

Flint must be an extremely wealthy town: I see that each of you bought two or three seats.

Musical

Three

Two

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Aging

Arms

Audience

Awards

Bits

Book

Boys

Christian

Christmas

Cold

Courses

Curves

Cute

Dad

Debussy

Differences

Distance

Dog

Dream

Eggs

Elephants

Essence

Explaining

Eye

Factory Workers

Family

Father

Fire

Firsts

Flats

Found

Funny

Government

Growing

Happiness

Has Beens

Hate

Heaven

Home

Humor

Humorous

Inspirational

Jobs

Joy

Keys

Knowing

Knows

Laughter

Legs

Logic

The Future Blueprint

Tool

The Home Therapist: Anti Anxiety

Tool

The Autobiography

Tool

The Behaviour Diary

Tool

The Dating Diary

Tool

The Relationship Therapist

Tool

Quotes by Victor Borge

Victor Borge

…the elephant smoked too much.

(Referring to the piano’s natural shape) Isn’t it a shame when those big fat opera singers lean against the pianos and bend them?

(Responding to a sneeze from the audience) Who exploded?

A Smile is a curve which can set a lot of things straight.

Always remember to forget the things that made you sad, but never forget to remember the things that made you glad.

And now, in honour of the 150th anniversary of Beethoven’s death, I would like to play ‘Clear the Saloon’, er, ‘Clair de Lune’, by Debussy. I don’t play Beethoven so well, but I play Debussy very badly, and Beethoven would have liked that.

Beethoven wrote in three flats a lot. That’s because he moved twice.

Clarinets, like lawyers, have cases, mouthpieces, and they need a constant supply of hot air in order to function.

Did you know that Mozart had no arms and no legs? I’ve seen statues of him on people’s pianos.

Flint must be an extremely wealthy town: I see that each of you bought two or three seats.

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Topics by Victor Borge

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The Future Blueprint

The Home Therapist: Anti Anxiety

The Autobiography

The Behaviour Diary

The Dating Diary

The Relationship Therapist

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